Poetry

A Dutchman's Dog Story

This little poem comes from a book my father kept on the ledge above his desk. When he was out I would often read it.
I enjoyed the shape and size of the book,and its binding. The pages are gilt-edged,it is covered in dark green cloth, the corners of the covers are rounded and the spine has a delicately traced floral design in gold. I would guess at an end-of-the-nineteenth century date.
It fits comfortably into the hand: I have always liked small books.
The title? 'American Humorous Verse'.
This is the poem I liked best. I would read it out loud to myself, trying to speak like a Dutchman,and laugh as I imagined the action! I shall copy the spellings exactly.



Dere vhas a leedle vomans once
Who keept a leedle shtore,
Und had a leedle puppy dog
Dot shtoodt pefore der door.
Und evfery dime der peoples coom
He opened vide him's jaw.
         Schnip! Schnap! schoost so,
         Und bite dem.

Vun day anoder puppy dog
Cooms runnin' down der shtreet,
Out of Herr Schneider's sausage-shop,
Vhere he had shtoled some meat;
Und after him der Schneider man -
Der vhind vas not more fleet.
          Whir-r-r! Whist! schoost so,
           Like vinkin !

Der leedle voman's puppy dog
Vhas lookin' at der fun,
He barkit at der Schneider man,
Und right pefore him run;
Den fell him down, dot Schneider man,
Like shooted mit a gun.
             Bang! Crash! schoost so,
             Und voorser.

Der puppy dog dot shtoled der meat,
Roon'd on und got avhay;
Der leedle voman's puppy dog
Der Schneider man did slay,
Und make him indo sausages -
Dot's vot der peoples say.
              Chip! Chop! schoost so,
              Und sell him.

                DER MORAL
Der moral is, dont interfere
Vhen droubles is aroundt;
Der man dot's in der fighting crowd
Vhill get hurt I'll be pound.
Mind your own peesness, dot is pest,
In life she vhill be found.
               Yaw! Yaw! schoost so,
                I pet you.

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